Answering Annie's Questions

Upon request, here's some of how I answer Annie's long strings of incessant questions.  Sometimes I just say, "I already told you, now go back to watching your show!"  I'm an amazing parent like that.

But I generally try to give honest answers because I want her to continue to feel like she can ask me whatever comes to mind as she gets older.

So, copied straight from the other post, here's some of what I say.

1) Who's my birth mommy?

I'm your birth mommy.  You grew in my tummy. (This is usually followed by wanting to get out the photo albums so she can see pictures of herself while I was pregnant.)

2) Who's Abraham's birthmommy?

Miss K (or sometimes I say Mama K, although we use her real name and not initial.  I use her initial here for her privacy.).

3) What color is Abraham's birthmommy?

She's about the same color as Abraham, dark brown.   Most times the baby that grows in a mommy's tummy is about the same color as her, or is a mixture of the color of the mommy and the color of the daddy.  (So far she has been completely disinterested in talking about Abraham's birth dad, most likely because we don't have open communication with him right now, so we talk significantly less about him.)

4) How was I born?

One night mommy and daddy sat down to watch a movie together.  At the very beginning of the movie, the sack of water that you lived in broke and that let me know it was time for you to be born.  So my body went into labor, which means it worked really hard to make room for you to come out.  Then I pushed you out and daddy caught you.

5) How did I come out?

I just told you how.  

6) Why did my hair turn a different color?

Everyone's hair changes during their life.  Sometimes it changes color, how curly or straight it is, how long it is, or what it feels like.  Your hair used to be dark and straight, now it's much lighter and curlier.

7) Then why won't my skin turn a different color?

Your skin has something in it called melanin.  The more melanin you have, the darker your skin is.   You have just a little bit of melanin in your skin, Abraham has a lot of melanin in his skin.  When you go out in the sun, you skin creates more melanin and gets a little darker, that's all the more your skin color will change though.

8) Why did I stay with you after I was born?

Because I love you and and wanted you and mommy and daddy were ready to take care of you.  We had what we needed to make sure you were safe and healthy to grow up.  

9) Why didn't Abraham stay with his birth mommy after he was born?

Miss K loves Abraham very much.  But, she didn't think she would be able to keep him safe and healthy, but she wanted him to be able to be safe and healthy, so she picked us because she knew we could take care of him and love him too.

10) Does she miss him?

Yes.  It's normal to miss people that you love when you don't get to see them all the time.  

11) Does he miss her?

I don't know.  I don't know how much he remembers her.  I'm sure when he's big enough to know who she is, he will probably miss her sometimes. 

12) Does he want to go back and live with her?

I think that right now he is very happy living with us.  He loves mommy and daddy and his sisters, and he wouldn't want to not live with us, just like you wouldn't want to not live with us anymore.